Well I’ve been apartment hunting and it is exhausting. I have encountered a lot of dead ends. This means people are not returning my calls or the place is already rented.

But I think I have found an apartment. It was actually one that I initially wanted. It’s tucked in a really nice neighborhood with a really large park a couple blocks away. It is approximately 48 acres. The park, not the apartment.

The only thing about this apartment is that somebody died in it, and that’s why it is up for rent. The person showing me the apartment told me that even though he wasn’t supposed to, according to him. Ok. Glad he did. It was of natural causes, so thankfully no murder or suicide. At least that was what I was told.

There was another apartment down below. The carpets had to be pulled out and fake hardwood installed. This was because the past occupier had a cat that peed everywhere. Cat pee smell is absolutely horrid.

So the apartment he was really trying to sell was the dead guy’s place. This one had brand new carpet in it, and is waiting for a brand new toilet. There was a big hole where the tank was supposed to be. Hmm….But brand new shower and flooring in the bathroom, along with brand new appliances for the kitchen. They were actually sitting in the middle of the living room, a new stove and fridge.

He said by the time all is said and done it would be around March 1st.

I got excited about the place because it has excellent lighting. Great for my plants. It has a pretty big living room and a comparable bedroom with a walk-in closet. Plus the neighborhood is gorgeous, with trees and the quiet. Brand new carpet. The building only has 24 units.

Now, though, I am lying awake at night doing the big fat “what ifs?” What if I have horrible neighbors? What if Charley freaks out? She’s only been in this one place for the entirety of her 4 year life. And, the “how am I going to move all my stuff?” Also, I’ve been living in my place for 7 years, and it’s my cozy little hideaway. I love what I’ve done to my apartment. What if….?

But I have this housing voucher, and the place I live in is not that great. It’s supportive housing. All kinds of people live here, except for kids. Granted, I am thankful it came to me when I really needed it. I just think I need to push myself for change.

Change is hard. I was going to say that change is especially hard when one is moving. Then I thought about it. I realized that all change is hard. It doesn’t matter if it involves changing your diet. It is changing your routine, going through a break up, or having your kids move out. Etc.

I just don’t want to be somebody who is resistant to change, so I’m willing to change that. Ha ha.

I guess I won’t think too hard about this. I haven’t even heard back if it is all a go. Why stress before I know for sure?